10.30.01: Pardon my brief and uneventful post yesterday; I had little to say and little time to write. Today I have decided to write my post for tomorrow, so that will be up later on today.

I have just got to campus; my morning thus far has included: shower/shit/shave, grab the shuttle bus to campus. Had an interesting conversation with this lady who takes the bus with me when she wakes up late or I wake up early. Generally we pass each other with a kind, "Morning," (not even the "good" is included) but today either she or I felt garrulous and we ended up talking the whole time. She is applying to Dartmouth for her MBA. I am wasting my life.

Coffee. Cigarettes. Throw on a collared shirt to teach in, and now I'm digging into the stream of consciousness half-asleep rantings which are typical of this site.

Got an e-mail from Lisa yesterday. I miss her a lot and feel really bad about my lack of contact with her. My feelings are lying in a pool on the floor right now; she still makes me melt thinking about her. If only we had been born on the same side of the ocean . . .

I got approval for my final paper in the Hermeneutics seminar yesterday. I am doing a topic which is in line with the research I am doing for my thesis, so I won't have to do extra work. I am truly a lazy bastard.

Getting drunk tonight. Karaoke. Hope all is well with you, I will drink a few for you if you are unable.

I am considering going to see the Genitorturers tomorrow in St. Petersburg (Florida, not Russia). Is it worth it? Can I afford it? Will I be able to pay rent? Stay tuned for answers to these pressing questions.

Must go teach. Look for my *spooky* Halloween post later today.

10.29.01: Ah, a very eventful week. Wednesday saw the U.K. Subs in concert. They were on, and their set was good if not a little short. But, they are still rocking at 300 years old. I also saw the Damned on Friday. I was not as happy with their set, as they only played TWO (2) songs from "Damned, Damned, Damned", perhaps their finest album (they were "Neat Neat Neat" and "New Rose" for my punk friends). If I ever hear the words "This song is from our new album" again, I will be forced to go on a small killing spree. The Damned may be "born to kill", but their 2001 tour and my hopes are the only two things they managed to make die.

I spent Friday drunk at the show, Saturday drunk at a con, and then Sunday recovering from said two nights.

I spent some time with Heather while I was in Orlando with Kat. Heather is rad; you all should come down and visit just to meet her.

Need to work on a paper on Heidegger. I'll write some more tomorrow. TTFN.

10.21.01: It's rainy in Tampa, Florida today. Overcast with a slight drizzle: perfect weather. I miss days like this living here. It's always so fucking bright and sunny. I miss the melancholy feeling that a rainy day brings on. I miss the slow drizzle on the brain that feels so good. Today is that day. I've spent most of my day smoking cigarettes on the smoking porch, outside the back door of the philosophy department. I came into the office today (Sunday) to do some research, but I have spent most of my time procrastinating. Who can get work done on a computer with a T1 connection?

My conversations with others as of late have helped me understand what must have been like to be a dissident in Germany in the 1930's. This nauseating feeling of nationalism is spreading, and people more and more look at me as the enemy for not going along with the rhetoric of a madman who justifies genocide and is hell-bent on bringing us into the next world war. The only difference, I guess, is that Hitler didn't stutter.

I've been working on the Husserl project more than my MA thesis. If I can finish this paper up in a few weeks, I'll have something presentable for a conference in the Spring. Besides, philosophy of mathematics is just cool.

I will be attending two old-school punk shows in the next week: I'm going to see The Damned on Friday and the U.K. Subs on Wednesday. Should be fun, I'll let you know all about it.

Fun weekend so far. Dan had a party last night; I got good and drunk. Woke up around noon to Kat's mother's visit. After a brief and cordial conversation with her mother and Grandmother, I went to the office still hung over. A few cups of coffee and a slice of pizza later, I'm feeling fine. I'll be going to see Animosity tonight at The Brass Mug. I'm feeling well: mentally, emotionally, and physically.

Hope all is well with you, dear reader. Drop me a line and tell me what is happening. Any interesting responses will get mentions. And on days that I don't update, Jay's website is a good option. I will hope to update at least twice next week, writing from punk-rock heaven.

10.19.01: I had several responses as of late to my rantings. I thought I'd use this forum to air these concerns, since I am a believer in true dialog and believe in full disclosure. If I have not explained my resons for my thinking clearly enough, this will give me the opportunity to explicate them more elaborately. And besides, it'll allow me to rant some more.

My first post is from All4U2wonder@aol.com:

I don't understand your views at all. Wait at this point I do quite possibly understand, you feel that because you are not happy others should suffer with you. That my dear is messed up. I am very sorry that you don't feel that your life isn't worth anything but there are other people in this world who do care. I feel that all the hospitals in OUR AMERICA need blood not just because of this tragity [sic] but just in reserves for when and if we need to help out in the future, because my dear this isn't the end of the strikes and many more people will need the blood!!!!! You read out of a book that was written by the CIA and you say you hate this AMERICA. YOU LIVE HERE!!!!!!

If you hate this place so much don't buy beer when your out at the [Brass] mug don't pay your rent( but don't borrow money from Crissy to pay it) Don't pay your electricity and your water ( you certantly don't need it you don't shower.) I don't understand your point of view and never will but you have things all messed up. Tom, why don't you just dig yourself a nice big fat whole and live in it!!!!!!

We should be thankfull and you should be thankful because you live in a free world, mind you yes it may not "conform" to your beliefs but at least it is a free world. I thought you were more intelligent than this. Tom, you really dissapoint [sic] me. I know you probably don't care how I feel about it but I listened to you and now you have heard me. I hate to be so rude and blunt about it but your views piss me off. I am ex-military and your friend is about to go into the Marines. You sat there and told me last night not to fight in this stupid war but it's not a stupid war Terriorism should not be taken lightly and those people killed innocent people and children. How would you like to be working and then all of a sudden be hit with a plane and your building crumble around you and you wai in the dark for someone to help you? Oh wait your [sic] Tom, you don't care you would give up. These people had families and people who cared about them just as you have people that care about you. I know that you know have a girlfriend that cares deeply for you and you care for her. You got what you wanted how would you feel if it was all taken from you in one fowl swoop and you could do nothing but wait and hope that someone cares enough to be there for you.

Well that's just my thought on the whole thing and I guess you can do what you will with this information.

Aside: Cut and pasted DIRECTLY from my email box. Aside from code to separate the paragraphs, this is as she wrote it. I tried to note the obvious grammar and spelling errors with the proper "[sic]" mark, but there are so mant that it is truly a lost cause. Ah, if only people had editors on e-mail!

A few points of criticism, and elucidation in case anyone is as confused as this reader. I am not unhappy in general; rather I am generally quite content with my life. I have a job I love, I have good friends who I can trust. I LOVE WHAT I DO. Philosophy is one of the few things in life that truly makes me happy. I do not wish for other people to be unhappy, on the contrary, I wish for everybody to share in the same bliss that I do. I want everybody to have a job they love. I hope I never have to hear the words "I hate my job" ever again. But, alas, I hear it every day.

I want people not to have to devote 50+ hours of their life to a job they hate. Life is so full of possibilities; there are much better things people could be doing with their time than to make somebody else rich. As H. D. Thoreau writes:

. . . I wished to live deliberately, to front only the essential facts of life, and see if I could not learn what it had to teach, and not, when I came to die, discover that I had not lived. I wanted to live deep and suck all the marrow of life . . .

Reader, to be honest, I'm quite sure what you are talking about. I'm not sure which "book written by the CIA" my reader is referring to, the only time I can recall mentioning the CIA here is either referencing my future arrest (Tom must be silenced in the name of "freedom") or of the CO-INTEL program which systematically murdered Americans who spoke a little too loudly or a little too clearly.

Additionally, I see little connection between the failure to pay one's rent and hating "this place." But, in partial response, I do not hate Amerikkka as such; I hate Amerikkkan foreign policy, I hate capitalism, I hate racism, I hate nationalism, I hate imperialism, and I hate the way our government operates covertly. But, I do not "hate this place." Please be more specific in your criticisms and elucidate the issues you find problematic. Do not assume I can see into your nationalistic head, for I cannot. Nor do I want to.

The notion of a "free world" my reader mentions is a trite one, but worthy of a few sentences. People rarely see the connection between politics and economics. One of my Marxist friend Doug often would say that one cannot have politics without economics. He is right. To say we live in a "free" society (as most claim) is to say that we have political liberties (which we don't even really have, but that's another rant); people often exclude the economic in this. We are not economically "free", but rather try to ignore the chains of oppression which we drag with us every day. These chains are what you mention: rent, food, clothing, and a maybe some beer which allows us to forget the fact that we have to get up and serve the system in the morning. We do not control our time: we spend most of our lives making others rich. Thus, you are either purposefully ignoring or are blind to the fact that we are economic beings, being tossed in a tumultuous sea of corporate logos and consumer goods. "This is the game that moves as your play," as Excene Cervenka defines it.

Now a point about war. You (as many others assert) that this is a justified operation to ensure domestic tranquility and the freedom from terrorism. American has had a long policy of ignoring terror throughout the world unless it suited our interest to get involved in. Many times (East Timor, the most notable example) the atrocities were caused either directly or indirectly by U.S. foreign policy. This is the case with Afghanistan. The attack on the WTC was not unprovoked: it was inspired as revenge for the U.S. intervention in the Middle East. We funded the Afghani war against the former U.S.S.R. in the 70's, and left the people to starve in bombed out buildings. We put the Taliban in power. We turned our backs on the oppression of the Afghani people by the Taliban for ten years, as it was not prudent for us to get involved. The guiding principle of U.S. foreign policy under Reagan, Bush Sr., and Clinton is: "What's in it for us?" No oil? Who cares. No strategic advantage? Who cares. Bin Laden is pissed off at us. We, as a nation, have nodody to blame for the WTC attack but ourselves.

I always need to say this: I understand the reasons behind the WTC attack because I am a student of history. I do not offer a justification for it, however. There is no justification for it. And, for the same reason that the WTC attack was unjustified, one would be contradicting oneself to say that the "War Against Terrorism" (tm) is justified. You talk about the civilian lives lost in America, but what about the civilian lives that are now being lost in Afghanistan every day we attack? We are not just attacking military targets; we are bombing cities. Mark my words: there will be more people killed by U.S. air strikes in Afghanistan than were killed in the WTC attack. What about these people? It would be stupidity or racism to not count them. Is it any wonder that no government in the world besides the U.K. is behind us? And of course the U.K. is behind us, they have a long history of imperialism and even more blood on their hands than we do ours (if that is a conceptual possibility).

Your stances on economics, politics and U.S. foreign policy are genocidal. Who is the one who is trying to "make others suffer"?

On a side note: your reliance upon ad hominem attacks to state your case is not proper in logical form, nor is it flattering. Your attempt to replace content with pointed jabs is inefficient and just makes one look downright silly.

To all: I will always accept well argued, well worded criticism; this is neither. To All4U2wonder@aol.com: if you wish to present a more consistent and more presentable critique, feel free. The only response this deserves is the following: I'm rubber, you're glue.

10.15.01: Several of my recent posts were deleted by a server glitch. I did not backup since 2 Oct. My apologies.

10.02.01: I felt the need to update, even though I have little to say. Woke up very early today; I couldn't sleep. I decided rather than lay in bed awake I would come to campus early. I left Kat's place so early the shuttle to campus wasn't yet running. I had a rather brisk 15-min. walk to campus while Kat lay in bed asleep. She rarely wakes up when I leave to teach on Tuesdays and Thursdays. But, I had tons of time to prepare for class.

The new Philosophy Gourmet Report will be out today or tomorrow. It is always an anxious time, as I may be going to a more prestigious grad school than I thought. If USF is even mentioned, I'll be surprised.

I've been Reading Robert Solomon's book "In the Spirit of Hegel". It's a great read so far. For all of my fair readers who are interested in studying German Idealism (that means you, Jay) I would recommend it.

Off to confuse a room full of Freshmen! Perhaps I'll write more later today, if I have anything more to say.

10.01.01: Had an interesting weekend. Spent time with people out (Kat, Leslie, Amy, Eric, Jackie, Daisy, Tampa Jay, Amanda, April) and got very little reading done.

Bought some books. Routledge FINALLY published Edmund Husserl's "Logical Investigations" in a new translation (the only one now in print), and Vol. 2 came in this weekend. Vol. 1 is in route. I'm not holding my breath, however. I ordered those volumes before the expected publishing date, which if memory serves was 15 Feb. 2001. I also bought Solomon's book on Hegel, and both volumes of a Habermas book that my major professor recommended for my MA thesis.

Tampa Jay has two friends coming to town in the next two weeks. Heather, who I've met a few times, is coming from Orlando this upcoming Tuesday. Next Tuesday his friend Big Ed will be in town, to which Jay has asked me to be prepared to "get fucked up old-school." This may be costly, both mentally and financially.

Tanya seems to think that I am now domestic. She has given me no reason why she might think this. I assure anyone that has these unfounded doubts that my sink is still overfilling with dishes, and I still am not able to cook as much as to re-heat. Let this assuage your fears.

However, Tanya did make some interesting points in e-mail to me:

This whole revival of American patriotism only serves as a buoy to keep capitalism afloat. In fact, I think this whole thing is actually being tailored in such a way that it will contribute to the perpetuation of our capitalist core. In fact, perhaps it's just what the Doctor ordered in terms of getting people more focused on money,its acquisition, and the good samaritan [sic] nature of giving it away to charities and our 'injured government' towards so-called relief efforts. Even stingy celebrities are parting with their surplus of cash to aid in "the cause." This is not a spring board to a revolution, these are the initial stages in protecting the capitalist society that brought us to this brink to begin with.

This brought up some thoughts I've been having as of late. First off, there are countless advertisements attempting to convince us to donate blood still. What is that do be used for? Anyone who has not been found in the rubble yet is dead. Simple physics: a contained fire has little oxygen to burn. When a fire is deprived of oxygen, it creates more carbon monoxide as a byproduct, and less carbon dioxide. This results in less energy released in the products of the reaction (because more energy is released in the creation of CO2 rather than CO), therein in burns hotter. Further, CO is poisonous. Thus, if anyone could possibly survive several tons of rubble falling on them, and could survive the hot burning core which should register several thousand degrees, and could survive not suffocating on the deadly CO gas, and could survive two weeks without food and water . . .

Giving blood is no longer necessary.

Next thought, why am I the only one that finds the fact that companies are advertising through this a travesty? It is the greedy capitalists who rape foreign countries of their resources and exploit foreign countries for cheap laborers who got us in this mess. The answer is not to go to a baseball game, or to buy a car, but precisely NOT to. If everyone stopped buying, then the economy would crumble, and we could morph into a real economy. It took World War I and then subsequent great depression to create the single greatest improvement in our laissez-faire system, the New Deal. If you want to be slaves the rest of your life, spend the little money you presently have frivolously, and see what it gets you: the "freedom" to work until you die early and broke. Fuck Amerikkka! Fuck Imperialism! Fuck Capitalism!

End soapbox.